Next morning, just before dawn, when about five
hundred and fifty miles from St. Joseph, our mud-wagon
broke down. We were to be delayed five or six hours, and
therefore we took horses, by invitation, and joined a party
who were just starting on a buffalo hunt. It was noble
sport galloping over the plain in the dewy freshness of the
morning, but our part of the hunt ended in disaster and
disgrace, for a wounded buffalo bull chased the passenger
Bemis nearly two miles, and then he forsook his horse and
took to a lone tree. He was very sullen about the matter
for some twenty-four hours, but at last he began to soften
little by little, and finally he said:
"Well, it was not funny, and there was no sense in
those gawks making themselves so facetious over it. I tell
you I was angry in earnest for awhile. I should have shot
that long gangly lubber they called Hank, if I could have
done it without crippling six or seven other people--but of
course I couldn't, the old 'Allen's' so confounded
comprehensive. I wish those loafers had been up in the
tree; they wouldn't have wanted to laugh so. If I had had a
horse worth a cent--but no, the minute he saw that buffalo
bull wheel on him and give a bellow, he raised straight up
in the air and stood on his heels. The saddle began to
slip, and I took him round the neck and laid close to him,
and began to pray. Then he came down and stood up on the
other end awhile, and the bull actually stopped pawing sand
and bellowing to contemplate the inhuman spectacle.
Then the bull made a pass at him and uttered a bellow
that sounded perfectly frightful, it was so close to me,
and that seemed to literally prostrate my horse's reason,
and make a raving distracted maniac of him, and I wish I
may die if he didn't stand on his head for a quarter of a
minute and shed tears. He was absolutely out of his
mind--he was, as sure as truth itself, and he really didn't
know what he was doing. Then the bull came charging at us,
and my horse dropped down on all fours and took a fresh
start--and then for the next ten minutes he would actually
throw one hand-spring after another so fast that the bull
began to get unsettled, too, and didn't know where to start
in--and so he stood there sneezing, and shovelling dust
over his back, and bellowing every now and then, and
thinking he had got a fifteen-hundred dollar circus horse
for breakfast, certain. Well, I was first out on his
neck--the horse's, not the bull's--and then underneath, and
next on his rump, and sometimes head up, and sometimes
heels--but I tell you it seemed solemn and awful to be
ripping and tearing and carrying on so in the presence of
death, as you might say. Pretty soon the bull made a snatch
for us and brought away some of my horse's tail (I suppose,
but do not know, being pretty busy at the time), but
something made him hungry for solitude and suggested to him
to get up and hunt for it.
And
then you ought to have seen that spider legged old skeleton
go! and you ought to have seen the bull cut out after him,
too--head down, tongue out, tail up, bellowing like
everything, and actually mowing down the weeds, and tearing
up the earth, and boosting up the sand like a whirlwind! By
George, it was a hot race! I and the saddle were back on
the rump, and I had the bridle in my teeth and holding on
to the pommel with both hands. First we left the dogs
behind; then we passed a jackass rabbit; then we overtook a
cayote, and were gaining on an antelope when the rotten
girth let go and threw me about thirty yards off to the
left, and as the saddle went down over the horse's rump he
gave it a lift with his heels that sent it more than four
hundred yards up in the air, I wish I may die in a minute
if he didn't. I fell at the foot of the only solitary tree
there was in nine counties adjacent (as any creature could
see with the naked eye), and the next second I had hold of
the bark with four sets of nails and my teeth, and the next
second after that I was astraddle of the main limb and
blaspheming my luck in a way that made my breath smell of
brimstone. I had the bull, now, if he did not think of one
thing. But that one thing I dreaded. I dreaded it very
seriously. There was a possibility that the bull might not
think of it, but there were greater chances that he would.
I made up my mind what I would do in case he did. It was a
little over forty feet to the ground from where I sat. I
cautiously unwound the lariat from the pommel of my saddle
--"
"Your saddle? Did you take your saddle up in the tree
with you?"
"Take it up in the tree with me? Why, how you talk. Of
course I didn't. No man could do that. It fell in the tree
when it came down."
"Oh--exactly."
"Certainly. I unwound the lariat, and fastened one end
of it to the limb. It was the very best green raw-hide, and
capable of sustaining tons. I made a slip-noose in the
other end, and then hung it down to see the length. It
reached down twenty-two feet--half way to the ground. I
then loaded every barrel of the Allen with a double charge.
I felt satisfied. I said to myself, if he never thinks of
that one thing that I dread, all right--but if he does, all
right anyhow--I am fixed for him. But don't you know that
the very thing a man dreads is the thing that always
happens? Indeed it is so. I watched the bull, now, with
anxiety--anxiety which no one can conceive of who has not
been in such a situation and felt that at any moment death
might come. Presently a thought came into the bull's eye. I
knew it! said I--if my nerve fails now, I am lost. Sure
enough, it was just as I had dreaded, he started in to
climb the tree --"
"What, the bull?"
"Of course--who else?"
"But a bull can't climb a tree."
"He can't, can't he? Since you know so much about it,
did you ever see a bull try?"
"No! I never dreamt of such a thing."
"Well, then, what is the use of your talking that way,
then? Because you never saw a thing done, is that any
reason why it can't be done?"
"Well, all right--go on. What did you do?"
"The bull started up, and got along well for about ten
feet, then slipped and slid back. I breathed easier. He
tried it again--got up a little higher--slipped again. But
he came at it once more, and this time he was careful. He
got gradually higher and higher, and my spirits went down
more and more. Up he came--an inch at a time--with his eyes
hot, and his tongue hanging out. Higher and higher--hitched
his foot over the stump of a limb, and looked up, as much
as to say, 'You are my meat, friend.' Up again--higher and
higher, and getting more excited the closer he got. He was
within ten feet of me! I took a long breath,--and then said
I, 'It is now or never.' I had the coil of the lariat all
ready; I paid it out slowly, till it hung right over his
head; all of a sudden I let go of the slack, and the
slipnoose fell fairly round his neck! Quicker than
lightning I out with the Allen and let him have it in the
face. It was an awful roar, and must have scared the bull
out of his senses. When the smoke cleared away, there he
was, dangling in the air, twenty foot from the ground, and
going out of one convulsion into another faster than you
could count! I didn't stop to count, anyhow--I shinned down
the tree and shot for home."
"Bemis, is all that true, just as you have stated
it?"
"I wish I may rot in my tracks and die the death of a
dog if it isn't."
"Well, we can't refuse to believe it, and we don't.
But if there were some proofs --"
"Proofs! Did I bring back my lariat?"
"No."
"Did I bring back my horse?"
"No."
"Did you ever see the bull again?"
"No."
"Well, then, what more do you want? I never saw
anybody as particular as you are about a little thing like
that."
I made up my mind that if this man was not a liar he
only missed it by the skin of his teeth.
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